What if hodling cryptocurrency could literally save you from blood sacrifice at the hands of humanity’s merciless Reptilian overlords? Launching its first-look teaser on October 10th, Hail Draconis is a crypto-native animated comedy series following the adventures of the Grand Reptilian Council, the shadowy, shapeshifting cabal of lizards pulling the…

Uh… don’t make any sudden moves? Elation resounds throughout the Reptilian world after the Grand Reptilian Council announced yesterday’s Earth-shattering summoning of the Probinator — Penetrator of Worlds! Rectifier of Transgressions! Painting the moon blood red with its arrival, O Six-Headed Destruction! “Nobody panic, absolutely nothing went wrong during the…

Expect spectacular skies tonight as the portal to Alpha Draconis bleeds torment into the fabric of our universe. One week ago, we delivered an ultimatum. Those working to undermine the Grand Reptilian Council were given seven days to recant their claims and recognise our primacy, or perish. Our warnings have…

Human fools, we were here first — As official representatives of the ancient shapeshifting cabal that runs this planet, the Grand Reptilian Council wishes to communicate its displeasure at the blatant falsehoods recently published in The Hollywood Reporter, claiming that new Fox Entertainment project Krapopolis is to be the world’s first on the blockchain. …

The unnatural glow of the Dark Moon of Draconis has unveiled yet another step towards total reptilian domination. Today’s revelation of the new Hail Draconis website and further plans for the spreading of the One True Coin have caused a small panic among non-$RPTC holders as they fight to be…

As the Dark Moon of Draconis turns its scarred face once again towards Earth, its stark light reveals the latest partner of the Grand Reptilian Council: digital marketing agency AndMine. With a dark influence that spreads across the Asia-Pacific region, AndMine is one of Earth’s leading digital marketing agencies, bringing…

As the dark moon of Draconis moves across the midnight sky, it heralds the announcement of the newest member of the Hail Draconis team: blockchain pioneer Gendry Morales. A specialist in creative uses for the blockchain who has been working in the space for the past four years, Morales is…

The blockchain’s weirdest cryptocurrency continues to break new ground with the announcement that Reptilian Coin (RPTC), the currency at the core of the shapeshifting Reptilian takeover of planet Earth, will soon feature in a pilot for an animated series. ‘The expanding influence of the Grand Reptilian narrative has led to…

A hot new cryptocurrency looks set to revolutionize money markets with its unorthodox value proposition, bizarre characters and out of this world storyline. Most new blockchain technologies promise financial services or transparent public ledgers, but Reptilian Coin offers something different. ‘Essentially, coin holders will be protected from becoming a blood…